How do a dozen years go by in a flash? You have a child.
Clay is 12 today. The day he was born – early and unexpectedly – I had no idea what the future held. I looked at Chase in the hospital that night and said, “What the f*ck just happened?” Today, living in Coronavirus quarantine, I feel the same way. But as uncertain as the future is right now, I know two things: Clay was meant to be mine, and he’s going to do great things in life.
We’re a lot alike, Clay and I. Strong-willed, first borns. Loyal as hell, but also tough. Our mouths get us in trouble sometimes, and if we don’t say exactly what we’re thinking you can easily tell by the look on our faces. We could eat burgers every meal. We’re honest to a fault and love hanging out with family and friends. If our gut tells us to be cautious, we listen. We like almost everyone. We enjoy bringing people together, mending fences, finding solutions and building teams. We’re okay being the center of attention. I’ve heard the term quiet confidence, although I’m not sure that’s perfect for us, as we’re rarely quiet.
It’s been an interesting year for us, since we’re now spending more time together than ever before. With Clay coming to Bishop’s for middle school, I knew we would have a new connection, commuting to school together and seeing each other around campus. I knew the school was the right place for him, but I had some concerns about him in the one place that, until now, was just mine. While we’ve had a few challenges (because he talks a lot in class, shocking), I love seeing him during the day, especially since he’s not too cool (yet) to come up and give me a hug in the lunch room or on the quad. I’ve also loved watching him come into his own – learning, making friends and finding new interests.
We’ve also been together – in our small home – for two months straight, avoiding a virus that started out as a joke about beer and turned into a pandemic that has disrupted our lives in ways we never imagined. In this time, he has shown how well he can adapt and keep a positive attitude. All of the things he loves – sports, school and friends – are off-limits. It started with one canceled baseball tournament and went from there to a world none of us recognize. He’s learning from his iPad in his bed because it’s his only private space. Friends complain about homeschooling, and I keep quiet. I don’t have to wake him for class or tell him to do his schoolwork. He handles it all on his own (with his amazing teachers). He’s motivated and self-sufficient, and I’m in awe of his ability to transition so quickly with such grace. I’ve seen adults struggle with this more than he has.
Like I said, I have no clue what the next few months hold for us. But I do feel very lucky to spend them with a very special 12-year-old. Happy birthday, Clay!
